of memoirs and musings

random recollections.silly sampat stories.wistful wanderlust.serendipitous discoveries.all things me.


Okay.

"Joel, I'm not a concept. Too many guys think I'm a concept or I complete them or I'm going to make them alive, but I'm just a fucked up girl who is looking for my own peace of mind. Don't assign me yours."
from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind*
Focus Features, 2004

These lines uttered by Clementine nailed me in the heart just as many more echoed conversations that have since come to past. I don't think it was the wine, the roast duck or the feta cheese that got me all soft watching the movie. No, not soft, nor vulnerable... just tergamam, a little overwhelmed in hell-yeah-I-so-totally-get-it-ness. So much about Joel reminded me of him and so much of the Joel-Clementine dynamics reminded me of us. The memories that I had tried to forget one at a time and then stopped short at the lovely ones because if I had erased those as well, I'd lose definition.

And ultimately, if you had known, would you still choose to fall?.
Perhaps sometimes, it is not a choice. You just do, even if only to find painful memories for keepsake and eventually, a stronger self in the aftermath.

*Eloisa to Abelard by Alexander Pope

4 Responses to “Okay.”

  1. # Blogger The Soothsayer

    What a great movie! Evoked lots of emotions in me while watching it. And the poem is good too. Didn't know it was based on an actual historical event until I did a search online just now. Interesting story.

    As an aside, after watching this movie, I had a discussion with my colleagues if we'd want to erase our memories of our company if we quit. We came to the conclusion we'd rather not - what if we went back for an interview after quitting and worked there again for a few years before repeating the whole process? :)

    The human memory's ability to selective remember good things is much superior to wiping out bad memories. We're able to live with ourselves much better and the old company isn't looking so bad now, too. ;)  

  2. # Blogger eyeris

    yup, ESOTSM was a brilliant movie. jim Carrey shold have at least been nominated for an Oscar! Stupid academy...

    I just love Kaufman's scripts...  

  3. # Blogger Ben Tan

    Hello my dear,
    Pity you can't come and see The Homecoming. I think Teddy is the most difficult role I have ever played! :-)  

  4. # Blogger carinasuyin

    the soothsayer & eyeris: Yeah!

    Ben: I just might! Will let you know... :)  

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