We don't choose the people for whom we fall. We can only choose to continue loving them, to make that conscious decision to put aside fears and worries, to do things that we didn't think possible, to entertain thoughts that scared the hell out of us months or years or lifetimes ago. We can choose to take the risk, because we think these people are worth it.
fray.com
"Fray is a magazine about true stories that's been publishing since 1996. We put up a new feature story about once a month, and each one ends with a posting area where you can tell your story right back. The website has four story sections and four other sections." Derek Powazek, founder and grand poo-bah
*This is one of my Fray favourite: Wrestling with an Angel
Sugeo a.k.a. budak Aalen is back for his summer break!! Since he has not eaten any bak chang for the past three years, mama, Supra and me made some over the weekend. The recipe is based on Grandma's traditional Hokkien one (lots of marinated belly pork, black-eyed beans, chinese mushrooms, dried chestnuts, dried oysters, dried prawns and of course, pulut rice) and Supra learnt how to wrap the rice dumplings from watching Astro !
adventure near the open seas
2 Comments Published by carinasuyin | Tuesday, July 12, 2005 | 11:28 PM.
a visit to the ECP for supper today brought back memories of a crazy adventure two years ago... here is the long-winded account written in an e-mail to dear super-G-lau...
p/s: there's no old war bunkers along the ECP lah, Joshi!! it's built on reclaimed land...
....................
sunday, july 6 2003
It all started out quite innocently enough... me and a bunch of friends decided to go lepak at the East Coast Park recreational area, Singapore's answer to Port Dickson, but of course, with much more public friendly amenities, proper skating/cycling, jogging paths, lots of beach esplanade pubs/bowling alley, pool/snooker centre, BBQ pits, gazebos, exercise equipments in sand boxed areas, the lack of huge commercialised resorts/hotels hogging up the beach front and what not...
We went there after lab at about 9pm... had dinner at Komala's which is the Indian vegetarian equivalent of McDonald's, had some masala, poori beriyani, chapati and lassi. Then we decided to go roller blading and cycling since we haven't been exactly sporty over the last few decades haha... It was dark, I couldn't see any beach, only the sounds of waves coming ashore on a high tide cycle. But the park was teeming with people... a lot of young people camping along the beach but many families and couples too...
We went to a skate/bike rental shop which opens till 1am... got a couple of bikes and blades. I chosed to blade first together with Hari, Yvonne, and Saurabh while Jigyasa (fondly known as Jiggs) and Joshi went cycling.So while Hari and Saurabh practiced falling down, me and Yvonne went along the skating path...chasing after the two on bikes... Jiggs, me and Yvonne locked our wallets and bags in a locker provided by the shop, we only took some money and Jiggs her phone...
After getting tired of all the cycling and skating and falling down, we took a rest by hanging out at the seashore... the breeze was warm and it was super windy... we traversed the shoreline and stopped at every old war sea bunker to chit chat and play spin the bottle... before we knew it, it was 2am in the morning... the park was still bustling with activities though... so we headed back to the shop to get our belongings.
Alas to our horror, the shop is closed and the lockers were moved into the shop already!! We had earlier thought that the lockers would be left outside just like the ones next to the public showers and other shops.... Arrrrrrrghhhhhhhh.....
We weighed our options... we could go back and come back again tomorrow to take the stuff. Problem was, our house keys were inside the bags. Waking up our other housemate was like waking a piece of wood... neither me nor Yvonne could remember her handphone or the house phone numbers too (arrghhhhhhh!!!) the guys offered to let us stay overnight at their place but that'll mean still having to travel one hour to the other side of the island and then drag ourselves back here. So what the heck, we decided to stay up and wait till the shop reopens at hopefully 8 or 9 am...
So there we go... 5-6 hours countdown... since we were not sleepy yet, we went and laid by the beach... the beach is quite landai... lotsa poky grassy knolls before the sandy part... so just nice (but still poky)to lie down and look at the cloudy skies so bright you can't see any stars. On the horizon were oil and cargo tankers all lined up and lit up... spoilers for the skies... the sea breeze was salty and warm... we just laid there and sang songs, talk and joked rubbish, laughed till our faces were tear-stained and huddled together next to Joshi (our big-sized papa bear) for warmth... Hari and Yvonne were already shivering after about an hour...
We moved to find a more sheltered place from the sea breeze so that the two of them could sleep a bit properly as they were really cold and drowsy. We settled by a sand box with lotsa gym-like equipments... the two promptly went to sleep on two tekan tubi/bangkit tubi wooden platforms while the 4 of us chatted away the night. Funny, i was only clad with spagetti strap singlet and jeans and yet I felt warm and nice... not even sleepy yet... the 4 of us aged 23, 24 were all like kiddoes, swinging on the monkey ladder, being gymnast wannabes on the parallel bars and balance beam...
Finally fatigue and the pain in the butt (really one, from all that falling down) translated into sleepiness and growling tummies... I really can imagine this must be how homeless ppl feel... to have to keep changing places to sleep and find warmth and yet block out the feeling of aches and hunger... In the end, Joshi and I decided to go find a 7-11 for coffee and some food. We came back with lotsa yummies and the rest were all gone... it was 4 plus in the morning. There were still several families with little kids in tow walking leisurely around the park and serious joggers/ exercisers doing their stuff... (what's wrong with these people?????)
Jiggs and Saurabh appeared from nowhere and told us `We've moved the invalids into the clearing next to the trees, they were too cold'... I suddenly felt all excited... wahhh... really a la the Lord of the Rings... it's like we've found Merry and Pippin and they are with Treebeard and trees... so we followed them to almost the carpark area where lots of huge trees sheltered a grassy clearing... so cool!! There;s something about a park at night/early morning that's lit with suffused orange street lamps and a tinge of moonlight that awakens the adventurous yearnings...
Yvonne and Hari really looked feverish... I had a sudden fear that they may have caught pneumonia or something... so we quickly gave them food and tried to get them to wake up and go jalan-jalan and gather some warmth or energy. Hari took happily to the food but Yvonne could not manage to eat anything... so in the end we gave up and laid down sprawled in a circle with them both... the grass was nice, a bit dewy but nice... not as poky as the ones on the beach. In fact, it was warm and cosy...
I was worried for myself... here I am all perky, energetic and excited when all around me were sleepy heads, worn out patience and stiff bodies... Maybe I'm having a fever and already delusional.... this is really crazy, i thought... i need my camera, i thought some more... wouldn't it be cool to climb the tree and take a picture of this moment from above? super cool.... then the several curious stares from passer-by taichi exponents and old folk joggers jolted me into reality... we must have made a funny sight... but who cares.... when one lies on the grass with only the skies above framed by trees, at 4 something in the morning... why would one care what others think of 6 jeans-clad youngsters sleeping on the grass?
Saurabh and Hari left for home as they were feeling a bit sickish... they had their wallets with them anyway... so we bade farewell and now there were only 4 on the grass. I was almost swept of to dreamland when suddenly Joshi woke me up to go to the beach and watch sunrise... Yippeee... an invitation too good to pass over, all fatigue left me and I was jumping up and down waking Jiggs and Yvonne.
We went to the same grassy knoll by the mini pier... i could see the lovely change of hues in the skies. the sun was rising on our left... some of the ships lining the horizon had moved, many little tugboats/service boats were zipping along the bigger boats like morrasses cleaning slime of sharks/whales...
in a matter of minutes, the skies changed from dark prussian bluish to purple to streaks of pinkish orangish... so nice... i loved the skies above the horizon... it was like you took a fat brush and coloured the skies with pink, orange and light blue, wide long smudges... then you take water and just wash them off the canvas to have a faded blended look. Then you take some cotton balls and stuck them onto the colours... let the cotton balls soak up some colour and mesh them a little... i suddenly thought that God must have had lotsa fun creating the Earth... if only got rainbow, then i can sing the kermit song out loud ahahahah...
We couldn't see the sun directly, blocked by the left side of the coast, but the changing hues sufficed... The skies cleared, I think I see Venus (blue colour mah) and Joshi claimed another bright thingie in the heavens was Jupiter (yeahhhh right, i dunno lah, doubt it)... hehe.... and slowly we could see the beach.... ewww... not so nice as the ones back home, definitely don't wanna swim coz like PD, very the oily looking.... Yvonne and Jigggs were asleep again, both in foetal positions... goose pimples were like so obvious on Yvonne... scary man... hope the sun comes out quickly so she can get some warmth.
I sat there thinking nothing, speaking nothing and just grinning.... then suddenly one big golden retriever appeared out of nowhere with his middle-aged lady owner... it was as if the dog was walking the lady ahahaha.... i went hallooooo doggieee... and the dog stopped. It ran towards me and i just sat there with open arms like you know, this is how you greet dogs ahahahhaha
The beautiful dog just went straight into my arms, almost knocking me over! Next thing I know, i have dog saliva all over my jeans and shoulders and a huge fuzzy fella in my face... sooooo cun!!! So i played with Jack (the dog's name), a bit of wrestling and basically lotsa baby praises from me kiah kiah..the dog must have been very flattered coz he was very warm with me and the lady complimented that I'm a natural with doggies... Finally, they both left.... sighhh.... such a wonderful doggie....
Joshi and the rest had already woken up by the time the dog lunged at me and were just sitting there waiting for me to finish manja-ing the dog hehe... We walked towards the shop. It was 7 and still the shutters were down and no signs of the owner anywhere.... Aiyohhhhh we all thought. We sat down by a bench at the beach opposite the shop and all 4 took the express train to Zzzz-Land.
We were jolted awake at about 8am when cries of `Hey, it's open, it's open already' came from Joshi. Woohooo, the uncle who owns the shop was busy arranging the signboards.... we went and got our stuff and took a cab home pronto...
Once home this morning, I took a long shower, dumped all the sand/grass filled clothes into the washing machine and went to bed... slept all the way from 10am till 7pm.
Wow...what a super cun 12 hours...
p/s: there's no old war bunkers along the ECP lah, Joshi!! it's built on reclaimed land...
....................
sunday, july 6 2003
It all started out quite innocently enough... me and a bunch of friends decided to go lepak at the East Coast Park recreational area, Singapore's answer to Port Dickson, but of course, with much more public friendly amenities, proper skating/cycling, jogging paths, lots of beach esplanade pubs/bowling alley, pool/snooker centre, BBQ pits, gazebos, exercise equipments in sand boxed areas, the lack of huge commercialised resorts/hotels hogging up the beach front and what not...
We went there after lab at about 9pm... had dinner at Komala's which is the Indian vegetarian equivalent of McDonald's, had some masala, poori beriyani, chapati and lassi. Then we decided to go roller blading and cycling since we haven't been exactly sporty over the last few decades haha... It was dark, I couldn't see any beach, only the sounds of waves coming ashore on a high tide cycle. But the park was teeming with people... a lot of young people camping along the beach but many families and couples too...
We went to a skate/bike rental shop which opens till 1am... got a couple of bikes and blades. I chosed to blade first together with Hari, Yvonne, and Saurabh while Jigyasa (fondly known as Jiggs) and Joshi went cycling.So while Hari and Saurabh practiced falling down, me and Yvonne went along the skating path...chasing after the two on bikes... Jiggs, me and Yvonne locked our wallets and bags in a locker provided by the shop, we only took some money and Jiggs her phone...
After getting tired of all the cycling and skating and falling down, we took a rest by hanging out at the seashore... the breeze was warm and it was super windy... we traversed the shoreline and stopped at every old war sea bunker to chit chat and play spin the bottle... before we knew it, it was 2am in the morning... the park was still bustling with activities though... so we headed back to the shop to get our belongings.
Alas to our horror, the shop is closed and the lockers were moved into the shop already!! We had earlier thought that the lockers would be left outside just like the ones next to the public showers and other shops.... Arrrrrrrghhhhhhhh.....
We weighed our options... we could go back and come back again tomorrow to take the stuff. Problem was, our house keys were inside the bags. Waking up our other housemate was like waking a piece of wood... neither me nor Yvonne could remember her handphone or the house phone numbers too (arrghhhhhhh!!!) the guys offered to let us stay overnight at their place but that'll mean still having to travel one hour to the other side of the island and then drag ourselves back here. So what the heck, we decided to stay up and wait till the shop reopens at hopefully 8 or 9 am...
So there we go... 5-6 hours countdown... since we were not sleepy yet, we went and laid by the beach... the beach is quite landai... lotsa poky grassy knolls before the sandy part... so just nice (but still poky)to lie down and look at the cloudy skies so bright you can't see any stars. On the horizon were oil and cargo tankers all lined up and lit up... spoilers for the skies... the sea breeze was salty and warm... we just laid there and sang songs, talk and joked rubbish, laughed till our faces were tear-stained and huddled together next to Joshi (our big-sized papa bear) for warmth... Hari and Yvonne were already shivering after about an hour...
We moved to find a more sheltered place from the sea breeze so that the two of them could sleep a bit properly as they were really cold and drowsy. We settled by a sand box with lotsa gym-like equipments... the two promptly went to sleep on two tekan tubi/bangkit tubi wooden platforms while the 4 of us chatted away the night. Funny, i was only clad with spagetti strap singlet and jeans and yet I felt warm and nice... not even sleepy yet... the 4 of us aged 23, 24 were all like kiddoes, swinging on the monkey ladder, being gymnast wannabes on the parallel bars and balance beam...
Finally fatigue and the pain in the butt (really one, from all that falling down) translated into sleepiness and growling tummies... I really can imagine this must be how homeless ppl feel... to have to keep changing places to sleep and find warmth and yet block out the feeling of aches and hunger... In the end, Joshi and I decided to go find a 7-11 for coffee and some food. We came back with lotsa yummies and the rest were all gone... it was 4 plus in the morning. There were still several families with little kids in tow walking leisurely around the park and serious joggers/ exercisers doing their stuff... (what's wrong with these people?????)
Jiggs and Saurabh appeared from nowhere and told us `We've moved the invalids into the clearing next to the trees, they were too cold'... I suddenly felt all excited... wahhh... really a la the Lord of the Rings... it's like we've found Merry and Pippin and they are with Treebeard and trees... so we followed them to almost the carpark area where lots of huge trees sheltered a grassy clearing... so cool!! There;s something about a park at night/early morning that's lit with suffused orange street lamps and a tinge of moonlight that awakens the adventurous yearnings...
Yvonne and Hari really looked feverish... I had a sudden fear that they may have caught pneumonia or something... so we quickly gave them food and tried to get them to wake up and go jalan-jalan and gather some warmth or energy. Hari took happily to the food but Yvonne could not manage to eat anything... so in the end we gave up and laid down sprawled in a circle with them both... the grass was nice, a bit dewy but nice... not as poky as the ones on the beach. In fact, it was warm and cosy...
I was worried for myself... here I am all perky, energetic and excited when all around me were sleepy heads, worn out patience and stiff bodies... Maybe I'm having a fever and already delusional.... this is really crazy, i thought... i need my camera, i thought some more... wouldn't it be cool to climb the tree and take a picture of this moment from above? super cool.... then the several curious stares from passer-by taichi exponents and old folk joggers jolted me into reality... we must have made a funny sight... but who cares.... when one lies on the grass with only the skies above framed by trees, at 4 something in the morning... why would one care what others think of 6 jeans-clad youngsters sleeping on the grass?
Saurabh and Hari left for home as they were feeling a bit sickish... they had their wallets with them anyway... so we bade farewell and now there were only 4 on the grass. I was almost swept of to dreamland when suddenly Joshi woke me up to go to the beach and watch sunrise... Yippeee... an invitation too good to pass over, all fatigue left me and I was jumping up and down waking Jiggs and Yvonne.
We went to the same grassy knoll by the mini pier... i could see the lovely change of hues in the skies. the sun was rising on our left... some of the ships lining the horizon had moved, many little tugboats/service boats were zipping along the bigger boats like morrasses cleaning slime of sharks/whales...
in a matter of minutes, the skies changed from dark prussian bluish to purple to streaks of pinkish orangish... so nice... i loved the skies above the horizon... it was like you took a fat brush and coloured the skies with pink, orange and light blue, wide long smudges... then you take water and just wash them off the canvas to have a faded blended look. Then you take some cotton balls and stuck them onto the colours... let the cotton balls soak up some colour and mesh them a little... i suddenly thought that God must have had lotsa fun creating the Earth... if only got rainbow, then i can sing the kermit song out loud ahahahah...
We couldn't see the sun directly, blocked by the left side of the coast, but the changing hues sufficed... The skies cleared, I think I see Venus (blue colour mah) and Joshi claimed another bright thingie in the heavens was Jupiter (yeahhhh right, i dunno lah, doubt it)... hehe.... and slowly we could see the beach.... ewww... not so nice as the ones back home, definitely don't wanna swim coz like PD, very the oily looking.... Yvonne and Jigggs were asleep again, both in foetal positions... goose pimples were like so obvious on Yvonne... scary man... hope the sun comes out quickly so she can get some warmth.
I sat there thinking nothing, speaking nothing and just grinning.... then suddenly one big golden retriever appeared out of nowhere with his middle-aged lady owner... it was as if the dog was walking the lady ahahaha.... i went hallooooo doggieee... and the dog stopped. It ran towards me and i just sat there with open arms like you know, this is how you greet dogs ahahahhaha
The beautiful dog just went straight into my arms, almost knocking me over! Next thing I know, i have dog saliva all over my jeans and shoulders and a huge fuzzy fella in my face... sooooo cun!!! So i played with Jack (the dog's name), a bit of wrestling and basically lotsa baby praises from me kiah kiah..the dog must have been very flattered coz he was very warm with me and the lady complimented that I'm a natural with doggies... Finally, they both left.... sighhh.... such a wonderful doggie....
Joshi and the rest had already woken up by the time the dog lunged at me and were just sitting there waiting for me to finish manja-ing the dog hehe... We walked towards the shop. It was 7 and still the shutters were down and no signs of the owner anywhere.... Aiyohhhhh we all thought. We sat down by a bench at the beach opposite the shop and all 4 took the express train to Zzzz-Land.
We were jolted awake at about 8am when cries of `Hey, it's open, it's open already' came from Joshi. Woohooo, the uncle who owns the shop was busy arranging the signboards.... we went and got our stuff and took a cab home pronto...
Once home this morning, I took a long shower, dumped all the sand/grass filled clothes into the washing machine and went to bed... slept all the way from 10am till 7pm.
Wow...what a super cun 12 hours...
Si Tu Me Olvidas
de Pablo Neruda
Quiero que sepas
una cosa.
Tú sabes cómo es esto:
si miro
la luna de cristal, la rama roja
del lento otoño en mi ventana,
si toco
junto al fuego
la impalpable ceniza
o el arrugado cuerpo de la leña,
todo me lleva a ti,
como si todo lo que existe:
aromas, luz, metales,
fueran pequeños barcos que navegan
hacia las islas tuyas que me aguardan.
Ahora bien,
si poco a poco dejas de quererme
dejaré de quererte poco a poco.
Si de pronto
me olvidas
no me busques,
que ya te habré olvidado.
Si consideras largo y loco
el viento de banderas
que pasa por mi vida
y te decides
a dejarme a la orilla
del corazón en que tengo raíces,
piensa
que en esa día,
a esa hora
levantaré los brazos
y saldrán mis raíces
a buscar otra tierra.
Pero
si cada día,
cada hora,
sientes que a mí estás destinada
con dulzura implacable,
si cada día sube
una flor a tus labios a buscarme,
ay amor mío, ay mía,
en mí todo ese fuego se repite,
en mí nada se apaga ni se olvida,
mi amor se nutre de tu amor, amada,
y mientras vivas estará en tus brazos
sin salir de los míos.
If You Forget Me
by Pablo Neruda
I want you to know
one thing.
You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists:
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.
Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.
But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.
de Pablo Neruda
Quiero que sepas
una cosa.
Tú sabes cómo es esto:
si miro
la luna de cristal, la rama roja
del lento otoño en mi ventana,
si toco
junto al fuego
la impalpable ceniza
o el arrugado cuerpo de la leña,
todo me lleva a ti,
como si todo lo que existe:
aromas, luz, metales,
fueran pequeños barcos que navegan
hacia las islas tuyas que me aguardan.
Ahora bien,
si poco a poco dejas de quererme
dejaré de quererte poco a poco.
Si de pronto
me olvidas
no me busques,
que ya te habré olvidado.
Si consideras largo y loco
el viento de banderas
que pasa por mi vida
y te decides
a dejarme a la orilla
del corazón en que tengo raíces,
piensa
que en esa día,
a esa hora
levantaré los brazos
y saldrán mis raíces
a buscar otra tierra.
Pero
si cada día,
cada hora,
sientes que a mí estás destinada
con dulzura implacable,
si cada día sube
una flor a tus labios a buscarme,
ay amor mío, ay mía,
en mí todo ese fuego se repite,
en mí nada se apaga ni se olvida,
mi amor se nutre de tu amor, amada,
y mientras vivas estará en tus brazos
sin salir de los míos.
If You Forget Me
by Pablo Neruda
I want you to know
one thing.
You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists:
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.
Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.
But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.
slide delight
A few of us in the lab tested out Google Earth yesterday by locating hometowns and cities. We looked for Mauritius, Kluang, Kuala Lumpur, Kuantan, Paris, New York, Rome, Ladakh, Beijing, Tokyo, Singapore and lots more. Although we couldn't locate some lesser-known places and most locations couldn't be zoomed into much, everyone was pretty amazed by it. Ken wished the images were real-time (he was looking at boats in Wallabout Bay, New York) whereas Ryan wished he had this tool when he was back in school. Yeah, it would have made geography, history and culture so much more fun!
I recreated some maps of European cities visited last summer using Google Earth, albeit not all of them since the 3D terrains for some locations are somewhat limited. Really liked the aerial view of the cities which gave a different perspective than as seen from ground level walking- Barcelona has neat organized blocks like a graph paper or mosaic tiles whereas Paris appears very disorganized and spirals whimsically outwards from the banks of the Seine. I am so pleased...
Barcelona, Spain
Paris, France
Rome, Italy
Vatican City
I recreated some maps of European cities visited last summer using Google Earth, albeit not all of them since the 3D terrains for some locations are somewhat limited. Really liked the aerial view of the cities which gave a different perspective than as seen from ground level walking- Barcelona has neat organized blocks like a graph paper or mosaic tiles whereas Paris appears very disorganized and spirals whimsically outwards from the banks of the Seine. I am so pleased...
Barcelona, Spain
Paris, France
Rome, Italy
Vatican City
